Yes, gentle readers, even a professional Insight Coach possesses blind spots so blindingly blind that we do, or say, or neglect to do or say, things that we regret in our personal lives. We miss opportunities to show compassion, or exhibit behavior meant primarily to soothe our own discomfort or pain. It usually comes about as a result of the one thing that is guaranteed to cause such lapses: not being present.
I recently turned to stand-up comedy at a moment when my best pal was suffering. I simply couldn’t take it in that she was suffering–after all, it seemed that her problems didn’t amount to a hill of beans in this world. OK, my world. But by judging her unhappiness as trivial (compared to my own at the moment), I missed an opportunity to be a quiet presence and a loving friend, and instead tried to lighten it up with a red clown nose and a pair of gigantic orange oxfords.
Needless to say, I failed at the attempt, and created an unwelcome distance between us that lasted until I called our special hotline (we’ve named the process “calling 1-800-A**HOLE”). There, I could apologize without feeling like a bad person, and admit that my own unspoken needs stood in the way of my capacity to hold space for my most precious friend.
I invite you to use the toll-free hotline whenever you act like a jerk, or allow your smallness to get the better of you. I guarantee both parties will feel much better. The call is free, and telling the truth about your feelings will free you.